JULES IN THE MAKING

Gratitude

2012-01-31T08:27:00.001-07:00

I sometimes forget how great life is. I take advantage of my health, education, career, family, and friends. I sometimes feel that we dwell too much on the negative things we have experienced; on the things that we do not have; on the things that people have said to us. The one bad thing we experience in one day overwhelmes all the great things we experienced that whole week. I am amazingly grateful for those moments when I am reminded in one way or another that life is good. It is a gift to enjoy. It is the kind of gift that only gets better with re gifting. When I meet or hear of people who have suffered things that I cannot even imagine, and yet remain hopeful, upbeat, loving, kind, giving, and energetic, I am humbled.

"I complained that I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet." -- Persian proverb

"No individual has any right to come into the world and go out of it without leaving behind him distinct and legitimate reasons for having passed through it." -- George Washington Carver

"Each time a man stands up for an ideal or acts to improve the lot of others or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope and, crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring, those ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance." -- Robert F. Kennedy

Check this out

2012-01-20T20:09:00.003-07:00

http://www.asecuredincome.com/maya

Who would have thought

2011-04-21T20:01:00.000-06:00

Classes are crazy, I am tired all the time, the commuting sucks with all the constructions on the freeway, I've been getting less sleep than ever, and yet I could not be more happy than I am right now.

Misc...

2011-03-31T14:56:00.002-06:00

There's something to be said for genuine people. I love and admire them!

Dancing

2011-03-02T17:09:00.001-07:00

With all the busyness of life and school, I feel profoundly this emptiness in my life that I just want to rectify. I am talking about dancing. I absolutely love to dance! I feel so sad that I have not been able to have the time to take classes. I try to go to the gym at least about 3x a week. And I try to make 2 of those days a Zumba day. Unfortunately, just getting those days in this semester has been a trial. I NEED to go to those classes. But I want more than that, I want to do Ballet and Jazz on top of Latin dancing.

There is something about being able to dance that makes me feel so happy. And as if all the stress I have experienced up to that point are flying off my body. I JUST WANT TO DANCE. I am determined to come up with some plan so that I am getting it at least twice a week (because I have not been able to in the last 2 months). I will be going tonight, I'll try to describe how I feel when I come home.

Friendship

2011-01-13T19:55:00.004-07:00

There has been so much going on! I had an aunt and uncle (siblings) die within a month of each other in unrelated causes. I am still enjoying my master's program. Enjoying getting to know new people. Working a lot. Spending time with my family. And realizing who my true friends are.

I just realized that there are just certain friends who are always there for me (Mika and Michelle are my best examples) whether it's convenient for them or not. With these people I am able to be myself, I know I can call and they will respond within a reasonable period of time. They are interested in what's going on in my life. They never judge me for my wrongs, whether they agree with me or not. They make me feel like I can conquer the world. I don't need them to call me every day or even every week to know that they do think of me and love me. They've been great examples to me on what friends really are and really do. I've tried to fix my behavior as a friend because of the kind of examples they set. I love them so much!

I have many friends that I make excuses all the time for. They're too busy right now, they are just free spirited, they have way too many friends to think about me once every three months, etc...I hope this does not sound bitter or sad. I've thought of this before and every single time, I just push it away. But let's face it, it's the same thing when it comes to relationships. No one's ever too busy to call/text. The real question is whether you are on their priority list or not. I am the kind of person where one good erases a thousand bad. Lol. It's funny. It's just that I am really now understanding what a true friend is. I've called a couple lately because I really needed a friend. And they did not bother to even call back, especially since I am not the kind of person to call very often. But, what really got to me was when I realized that I was the same kind of friend. I did not always make a great effort at staying in touch. I am getting better, but I am still not there yet. I don't expect for people to want to talk to me every day or even every week. But I've realized that I could be in the hospital for two or three months and some people would not even know it. And when we did talk, some of them never even asked what was going on in my life just about what was going on in theirs. And there are some who only contact me when they need something. Here's the question: Are these people friends or acquaintances?

Don't get me wrong, I am also realizing the error of my ways and have been getting much better at staying in touch with people, even if it's a simple text. I hope to become a better friend to my friends.

Over 24 hours of no sleep/Meditation

2010-10-21T01:35:00.000-06:00

I had a huge exam today and, unfortunately, was only able to study for it for 2 hours last week. I was in quite the state this week trying to get a presentation done and study for this exam. I finished my presentation yesterday (which is when I had to give it) and that was when I was able to study for my exam. I have not slept in over 24 hours studying for it. I felt wide awake when I took my exam this afternoon, which I was not sure I would be. I expected to have crashed already. But now I think the thrill of being done with it is still keeping me up.

On a different note, I've realized lately just how important it is to meditate. Everything around us is so noisy. And we keep ourselves constantly occupied. When do we get the chance to commune with ourselves and with our Father in Heaven? I am really bad at taking time to just ponder. But I am trying to make it a goal to do this at least a little bit every day. We'll see how it'll go :-)

The miracle of life

2010-10-04T23:12:00.001-06:00

My aunt suffered a stroke last weekend and it was tough. For a while, we did not think she would make it. I was constantly going back and fourth between school, work, and the hospital. And I was sleeping over the hospital, which is not a very restful place to be. I think I got about six hours of sleep all together last week. My sister was doing the same thing. She was going back in fourth between her family, school, business, research, and the hospital (this woman truly astounds me with all the things she can do). It was a busy week for us, but it was definitely worth it. To see my aunt's face light up when we came in the room (even when she could not move much). Family really does play a big part in helping their love ones heal. And when The doctor found out that this was her sixth stroke, we cried. Sixth stroke! I am not sure I would have survived a first one. What an amazingly strong woman to have survived those. And the miracle is, she is doing much, much better. She is also regaining strength on the right side of her body, as well as her speech. She went home today from the hospital. I LOVE MIRACLES!

Dating through text

2010-09-21T02:14:00.001-06:00

I have nothing really exciting going on. School and work pretty much occupy my time. Well...maybe not ALL my time. I have made a commitment to myself to be as social as possible. And I have to admit that I have done pretty well at this...for now :)

I made a goal to go on at least one date a week. And so far so good. Last weekend, I was in way above my head. These three guys were texting me about dates and I had already fallen asleep by the time they text me. Well, I woke up and said yes to all three. Yes...for the same night! Well, you can't blame me too much, people. I was half asleep! I ended up cancelling all of them. But honestly, why are these guys waiting until the last minute to ask for a date?! They wanted to go out the next night. AND what is up with them TEXTING me about it? An old fashioned phone call is all I am asking. To be honest, my interest in them waned a bit after this. I am still going on a date with them, but I am not that excited. It's sad because they are all nice boys. I told them that they needed to plan ahead of schedule next time and then I would have the time.

Am I being too picky or unreasonable?

UPDATES

2010-08-26T01:05:00.000-06:00

I have been insanely busy for many reasons. One, I started my master's study in Pathology (or biomedical research) on Monday and until Saturday, I did not have a place to live. I was not homeless, just wanted to find a place in the same city I was going to school. Did not want to commute because I can't stand it! But luckily, I found something on Saturday close to school and moved in Sunday. I can tell my classes are going to be intense. Yet, I feel flutters of anticipation go through my body constantly. I am following the right path. My heart feels good and happy. And my mind feels as peace and stimulated.

Something else that has kept me busy is that I had family visiting from out of town and of course, I had to show them around. It was fun...and crazy. The last of them left on Sunday.

I had a relationship end recently and to be honest, I am relieved. It had dragged on much longer than it should have. Now we can both move on and find people that will make us feel happy and excited. I've made a new rule for myself. No more long distance dating. There's only so much growth a relationship can have when you only occasionally spend time together. That's twice I have tried it and twice that it has not worked out. My next one, I hope, will be close to home.

Many new chapters in my life, we'll have to see where it leads! I'll be better about keeping you posted.

Who would you have been?

2010-07-21T01:14:00.000-06:00

We look back in history and often think one of two things. One, "What an amazing and brave person who did so much for..." or two, "I can't believe that anyone would do something like that, it's so..." Sometimes we think "I would/could never do that." Is that true? I could not help but wonder, who would I have been. Am I who I am today because there is a basic part of me which is unchanging. Or am I a product of my environment? I read this quote by Bruce Barton that says,

"If you have anything really valuable to contribute to the world it will come through the expression of your own personality, that single spark of divinity that sets you off and makes you different from every other living creature."

Is that spark of divinity infinite? Would Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, Eleanor Roosevelt, Winston Churchill, Susan B. Anthony, or Martin Luther King have been who they were if they had been born at a different time or place? Well, I believe that even if they had not had the issues they had to deal with, they would have been fighters for other things. They would have stood for something whether great or small. Yes, we are a product of our environments, but that is not all of who we are. Look at this quote by Susan B. Anthony, does it sound like she is just the person she was suppose to be for the time she was born in?

"Cautious, careful people, always casting about to preserve their reputation and social standing, never can bring about a reform. Those who are really in earnest must be willing to be anything or nothing in the world's estimation, and publicly and privately, in season and out, avow their sympathy with despised and persecuted ideas and their advocates, and bear the consequences."

No one wants to be persecuted, friendless, or hurt. But there are people out there who sees things that are not right, things that needs fixing, and they are unable and unwilling to just do nothing. Could we have seen an injustice and done nothing? Who are we? Who am I? It's so easy to look back and think, "I am not that brave" or "I am not that cruel."

Now, don't get me wrong, I don't believe that Hitler and Stalin were meant to be cruel people. I believe that they had strong personalities that were willing to change things. Unfortunately for the world, they always made the wrong decisions. They used that power to hurt, submit, and commit acts of such cruelty that I cringe to think of them. My heart sorrows for those who experienced the results of those wrong and weak decisions. But it was a series of small erroneous choices that lead to the hate and violence felt by a large group of people. Who are we and who are we willing to be? What decisions would we have made? What decisions have we made?

We don't necessarily have to change the world...at least not at first. But we can change the lives of a few people around us. If we died today, what would people say about us? What would our friends and family? We can change their lives for the better. Again I ask, who are we willing to be? Our core personalities do not change, but we can change how our personalities are directed outwards. I am so hesitant and unassertive sometimes that I wonder at the decisions I would have made in the place of Martin Luther King. What decisions could I make today if I am faced with a major issue? I don't know and because of that I need to start working on the daily things I do/say now so that in the future, I can answer this question unhesitatingly.

"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." Edmund Burke

Educational Progression

2010-07-01T03:44:00.002-06:00

       One day, I was listening to conference at work when suddenly the idea came to my mind that I needed to apply for my masters. I sort of laughed at the idea b/c that seems like such a waste of time to me. Why would I apply for my masters when I am going to apply to med school? But then randomly, my co-worker started talking about how she's never regretted getting her masters. I thought, "well, I better look into it." I looked at BYU and the only masters they really had in the sciences was the masters in science education. I was DEFINITELY not interested in that. I looked at UVU and their programs sucked. And so I finally looked at the U and they had a masters in pathology. I thought it was perfect! It was located in the med school. I felt like it was a program I needed to do. What a great way to prepare for med school! Around the time I was looking at that, it was the 5th or so and I saw the application deadline had been on the first. I couldn't understand it. How can I feel so guided to do somethings only for it not to work out?

       Well, I felt like I needed to contact the admissions office and when I did, they said they did accept late applications but I would have to check with the department I wanted to get my master's in to be sure if THEY accepted late applicants. When I contacted them the next day, they secretary said it was too late and that letters had been sent out and I would have to wait until spring. I saw no point to waiting until spring. By then I would be done with most of my pre-med classes. But if I could start the masters in the fall, it would take me as long to finish that as it would my pre-med classes. It sounded perfect! Perfect until I found out I couldn't do it. I was very disappointed. But then, the idea came into my head to contact the director of the program and so I did. After talking to her for awhile, she said that if I could get my application in as soon as possible, she would consider me. I was overjoyed.
      I worked as hard as I could to get everything to her. The transcripts ended up taking a little more time to get there than I hoped, but it got there. I think about two weeks later I received a letter. I was not home when it came and so while with Mika, I asked my mom to open it for me. She played a cruel trick by telling me it was a rejection letter :) But in all actuality, it was an acceptance letter and now I start the program August 23rd!

     I don't know which one of you have read The Alchemist (which I highly recommend), but I feel like I am following my omens. And because I am everything is lining up so that I can accomplish my goals. Life, right now, if filled with so much possibilities. I love it!

Milk Banks

2010-06-18T02:52:00.001-06:00

I was reading a Newsweek article about Milk banks. If you don't know what they are, no worries, it was something new to me as well. Milk banks are places where parents who cannot lactate ( either because they are adaptive parents, or male, etc...) can get the antibody, vitamin rich breast milk of another woman. These breast milk products are screened just like blood products are since you can catch viruses and other things through breast milk. But it cost 3$ an oz and since babies drink approximately 30 ounces a day, it could get a bit expensive.
Fortunately, I guess, some of these parents found other avenues that would cost them...well...nothing. There are women in the U.S. who want to share freely with others of their milk. They produce more than enough for their own child and want to give all the excess away instead of it going to waste. The problem with this is, it's very hard to screen for diseases and other illnesses. You are not practically guarantee safe nourishment for you child.

I found the concept interesting. It just never occurred to me before that this was something that occurred. It's true that breast milk is a baby's best option, but still the idea of getting it from someone else, if I was not able to provide it for my child, is such a foreign concept to me. I asked myself after reading it whether I would ever purchase breast milk and I cannot imagine doing so. I myself was only breastfed once. My mother was sick after she gave birth to me and the doctors advised her that for my benefit, she should not breastfeed me. I consider myself to be a pretty healthy person. Perhaps if I was not, I would feel very strongly about using breast banks. Perhaps it's because I am not yet a mother and cannot understand the drive to provide the best of everything for my child no matter what. Or perhaps it's because being a husbandless/childless independent adult, I've become a bit selfish in my thoughts and feelings. It could be for a number of reasons why I have a hard time imagining myself being one of the parents who use breast milk banks.

I am not against the idea at all. I think it's great that parents have that option available to them. And I think it's great that there are people out there who are willing to share so much of themselves to help someone else. I am just saying that I don't know if I would use one. Would you? Could you?

Here are a few links if you want to find out some of the benefits of breastfeeding as well as the link to the Newsweek article.
http://www.nrdc.org/breastmilk/benefits.asp

http://www.womenshealth.gov/breastfeeding/

http://www.newsweek.com/2010/06/16/others-milk.html#

Mountain Climbing

2010-05-09T13:39:00.000-06:00

As some of you might know, I have a fear of heights. It's not a paralyzing fear, but a fear nonetheless. Well, a month or two ago, I went climbing indoors. I was so scared, but it was fantastic! What a rush. Friday I took it one step further and climbed and repelled outdoors. There were many times I was sure I was going to die. I can be so clumsy sometimes that it was completely foreseeable that I would just accidentally step on a lose rock and fall to my death. Not only did I not die, but I had an even better time than I did when I did it indoors. I will definitely do it again!

The Holi Festival/Festival of colors

2010-03-29T23:03:00.000-06:00

http://www.utahkrishnas.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=100&Itemid=190

If you have never experienced the Holi festival, where spring is welcomed, then you have been missing out! check out the website for more info.

Taking Chances

2010-03-24T22:20:00.005-06:00

One of the worst things I've feared happened to me a while ago and...I was ok.

When it comes to matters of the heart, I am the kind of girl who likes to sit back and let it happen. That does not mean that once action is taken towards me I do not reciprocate. But I do not take chances. Not when it comes to my heart. I always thought it was because I was an easy going girl and I went with the flow. But I've had a chance to look at myself lately and I've realized that I am a complete coward when it comes to love. That was something interesting to discover about myself after all these years.

It is ironic that in my quest to protect my heart, I have had it broken. It was one of the most painful experiences of my life. I was right, there is no pain that equals a heartache. Nothing. I've never cried so much in my life. To my amazement, though, I've learned so much from that experience. Don't get me wrong, at times I still think, "When will this pain end! I can no longer endure it!" But even doing those times, I felt like it was worth it. I've learned so much about myself as a woman. And my heart has never been as open as it is now. I took a leap of faith and have landed in a place I have never been before. It's mysterious but full of life. I feel like a new me. I am no longer the Laureen I used to be. I am no longer the Laureen that is afraid to love and be loved. I am now a woman who knows that when she loves, she loves deeply, thoroughly, and faithfully. And that I want a man with a faithful heart. Not one that fades away easily and fast. To me, that is not love. At least not the kind I want. Everyone has their own definition of relationships, friendships, and love. No one person's definition is necessarily wrong. But not one size fits all. I cannot impose mine on anyone else, but I can know what fits me best and what makes me feel the happiest. And being the sassy girl that I am, I know he will have to love me faithfully in order to put up with me for, hopefully, 30 or more years :). There really is nothing that compares to the feeling of being truly, completely, and unconditionally loved and wanted. And nothing to the warmth, fullness, and passion of loving. I feel like giving them the world, even when they make me mad or sad. I feel like doing everything in my power to make them happy. I will love again. Is the pain worth it? Yes...yes it is.

Mikarose Mother's Day Giveaway!

2010-03-09T00:15:00.000-07:00

Mikarose Clothing Company is offering the ‘Marvelous Mother Giveaway.’ The Giveaway offers an exciting grand prize package which includes:

• Two Economy Class, round-trip tickets to Tampa Florida from any major city in the
Continental United States.
• A Five night Western Caribbean Cruise on Carnival Cruise Line.
• Round Trip transportation from Tampa International airport to the Tampa Cruise Terminal.
• A $100 dollar MikaRose Gift Certificate.

The sweepstakes runs from March 08, 2010 through April 12, 2010. To Nominate a Marvelous mother simply go to www.mikarose.com. Visit this same site to view the complete giveaway rules. No purchase is required to enter the Giveaway. Four finalists will be chosen and their stories placed online where individuals will have an opportunity to vote for the mother they feel deserves the giveaway out of the four finalist. The winner will be announced on May 3rd 2010.

25 Fascinating Love Facts

2010-03-07T22:09:00.000-07:00

I just read 25 love facts on MSN (http://lifestyle.msn.com/relationships/articlematch.aspx?cp-documentid=10416019>1=32023) and thought some of the things they mentioned would be great to share. Especially with those of you I've had similar conversations with.

1. Men who kiss their wives in the morning live five years longer than those who don't.

4. Feminist women are more likely than other females to be in a romantic relationship.

5. Two-thirds of people report that they fall in love with someone they've known for some time vs. someone that they just met.

7. Falling in love can induce a calming effect on the body and mind and raises levels of nerve growth factor for about a year, which helps to restore the nervous system and improves the lover's memory.

8. Love can also exert the same stress on your body as deep fear. You see the same physiological responses — pupil dilation, sweaty palms, and increased heart rate.

9. Brain scans show that people who view photos of a beloved experience an activation of the caudate — the part of the brain involving cravings.

17. People who are newly in love produce decreased levels of the hormone serotonin — as low as levels seen in people with obsessive-compulsive disorder. Perhaps that's why it's so easy to feel obsessed when you're smitten.

18. Philadelphia International Airport finished as the No. 1 best airport for making a love connection, according to an online survey.

20. A man's beard grows fastest when he anticipates sex.

8,9,17- No wonder people are so afraid to fall in love if these are the things that happen. But the thing I kept thinking about after reading this list is that I NEED TO FLY TO PHILADELPHIA ;)

George

2010-02-24T22:10:00.000-07:00

George is one of the people that I met on my trip to Haiti. He is a Nurse Practitioner that I worked with. He is an absolutely amazing person. We had so much fun together. He inspired me so much with his generous giving. And his humble attitude. I am so fortunate to have met people like him on the trip. I received an e-mail from him and it just made me smile and laugh.

Here is what he said:

Glad to have found you Easy to tell you are the sunshine in many people's lives, just by looking at the comments. It makes me laugh to think about how I, in a surge of brotherly concern for your safety, rushed to the morgue to protect you from any unknown dangers when you went looking for transportation for the elderly woman who died in our tent. I found you surrounded by those, obviously interested young men. Although you had the situation well in control, I offered to serve as your protction in the form of your husband. Whether or not they got that word or believed it, I felt honored you would allow me the dignity of being your protector.

I absolutely love that guy!

I am back!

2010-02-13T23:21:00.000-07:00

Just got back yesterday from my medical mission in Haiti. I can't wait to start blogging about my experience there, but for now, I am just very very tired. More tired than I realized I would be. But to sum up my experience there, let me say this:

It was amazing! It was tiring, frustrating, annoying, heartbreaking, sad, happy, awe inspiring, humbling, delightful, and tender.

Relief Force to Haiti

2010-01-26T10:32:00.000-07:00

I am excited to announce that I was accepted to be part of a relief force to Haiti! I was suppose to have left Wednesday morning, but now (to give the people there more time to collect orphans that some will be coming back with--I think about 150) I will be leaving Thursday morning for three weeks. I am so excited! Imagine having the chance to help in a situation like that?! I will be helping with the medical, construction, and translation part of things. To find out more info, check out this website http://www.utahhospitaltaskforce.blogspot.com/.

I am also scared because I have lead a very sheltered life. I have never seen the things I will see. Dead bodies litter the streets, something that anyone would find shocking. They say that Haiti will become a country of amputees. The earthquake caused many things to fall on people, destroying limbs. And then people have had to cut off limbs because they did not have the tools they needed to save them. It was either an arm or a life.

I know this trip will change me forever. And I am hoping that change will be for the better. Either way, it's worth it in order to save others. Even if it's just one life.

Focusing on Haiti's beauty

2010-01-14T18:33:00.002-07:00

I feel that a lot of what I hear of Haiti are the sad and ugly parts. It is filled with beauty, love, charity, sadness, pain, violence, and many of the other things that can be found at other parts of the world. But for now, I wanted to show some of the beautiful things that can be seen on this island. My parents talk a lot of the nice things they used to see and experience as teenagers there. They especially make sure to tell me these things when all I say of Haiti are the things I hear in the news. These pictures are some that I found in a facebook group. Since my parents have not been there since they were teenagers, they did not have modern pictures that I could post. Hope you guys will like what you see!

Haiti

2010-01-13T23:27:00.003-07:00

(photographer unknown)

On Tuesday January 12, 2010 a powerful 7.0 earthquake hit Port-au-Prince, the capital of Haiti. The earthquake only lasted for 30 seconds, but in that short time, everything changed. The destruction was massive and unexpected. This was the most severe earthquake that Haiti has experienced in 200 years. But even if they had known of an impending earthquake that was going to be this severe, it would have been extremely hard for them, the poorest country in the Western hemisphere, to adequately prepare for it. It has been estimated that most Haitians (~ 80%) only make two dollars a day. Imagine a country where ~80% of its people live below the poverty line. There is no way they could have planned adequately for this disaster.

Many were killed and injured during the earthquake. As of today (Wednesday January 13), the Haitian government believes that between 30-50,0000 of its people were killed in this devastating disaster. The hospital in Port-au-Prince was also destroyed which leaves many of its injured homeless and unable to access the kind of medical help they need. This is why there is an big need for volunteers and donations. I myself have family in Haiti who, as of right now, I have not heard from. I have no idea where they are, if they're ok, if they'll be safe. I could not sit idly by and worry without doing anything. This is why I am writing this post and working with Healing Hands. This is also why I understand the need for volunteers and help. I cannot be there, but I very much appreciate those who are...and those who give; Who gives their money, and most of all, their time.

There are many non-profit organizations working round the clock to organize relief for Haiti. One of these is Healing Hands for Haiti. Healing Hands for Haiti has been providing help since 1998 and now, in Haiti’s ultimate need for help, they are doing even more to provide and comfort. They are a company that originates from Salt Lake City Utah. They can be contacted at healinghandsforhaiti.com. The best donation right now is money because it can reach them much faster than anything else. Also, because no one has any idea of all the things that Haiti would need considering that things are still in chaos. But anything anyone is able to provide would be very helpful. Mika, one of the owners of MIkarose clothing company is working with them to organize anykind of help they can provide. They are gathering supplies for a container that Helping Hands for Haiti is planning on shipping to Haiti this weekend. Please go to their website mikarose.com to find out more information.

Ari's Babysitting experience

2009-12-27T20:20:00.001-07:00

Last week, Mika and I were out taking a final or returning our textbooks. When we came home, Brad was in the dining room trying to study. Ari and her neighbor/friend Presley were in the living room...undecorating the christmas tree. And Ellie was lying down on the couch, nicely arranged on a pillow...very close to the edge of the couch. Not close enough that we ran in panicking to catch her. But close enough that if she had started to roll (which she only does a little) too much she would have fallen over the edge. Here is how things went:

Mika: Brad, how can you sit there while the kids undecorated the tree?!

Brad: The kids are doing what? I thought they were playing, so I did not think anything of it. (I should mention that the dining room and living room are right next to each other w/o a wall really to divide them. There's an archway.)

Mika: And why did you put the baby so close to the edge of the couch?

Brad: The baby is not in her crib?

I thought it was all very funny until the baby part. What happened is that the dog escaped and so Brad ran after him. Right when he left, the baby started to cry and Ari, being the little mother that she is, decided to go get her. Here is how Ari and Presley describe what happened:

Ari: I climbed into her crib and Presley waited on the ground right next to her crib. I lifted her up and gave her to presley. Presely held her real tight so that she wouldn't fall. Then I climbed down and took her from Presley and carried her into the living room. She liked it.

Me: But Ari, she could have fallen and been hurt.

Ari: But May, I held her super tight and I hold her all the time. We were very careful.

Me: Yes, but still, accidents happen.

Ari: But May, I would never hurt her. And she was very happy. She didn't cry. And we're big girls.

And thankgoodness both of these girls are beastly strong because I have nightmares when I think about what could have happened. I am also a bit impressed that they were able to think of a good system and pull it off. While being careful. Not once did Ellie cry. What a brave little thing. I think she enjoyed herself, actually. With these girls, it's always one adventure after another. Life is never dull!

Man

2009-12-25T18:21:00.001-07:00

There is something just very sexy and intriguing about Latin men. They manage to be very open and very mysterious all at the same time. They make you feel beautiful and appealing. And who can forget their sexy accents.

Actually, this is also how I feel about European men. They do not play the games that American men do. Very straight forward. Even if it is to ask you to sleep with them within ten minutes of knowing them. At least you know where you stand.

This not a hit at anyone specifically, to be honest. I was just reflecting. I've gone out with man of different backgrounds, race, culture, and viewpoints. And it's interesting to note some differences and similarities. If any of you want to share some of your viewpoints on this, please, let me know.

Breaking up is hard to do

2009-12-20T23:58:00.000-07:00

Relationships are really interesting. I thought once you broke up, that's it. You don't really think about the other person and you move on. I must admit that I never understood when others would talk to me about how hard they found it to open a new door in their lives that did not include the other person. Well friends, I apologize for not understanding what you meant then. And if I was ever overly critical. I've had to go through that lately (thankgoodness am past that stage now)and it has made me a more compassionate and sympathetic person. It's always good to learn something from your trials, right? That's the whole point, I guess :).

Hmmm

2009-12-13T04:12:00.000-07:00

It was brief but deep
He knew me well but not at all
I left him...but he left me
My heart is relieved as it is breaking.

The Passionate Shepherd to His Love

2009-12-13T03:54:00.001-07:00

Come live with me and be my love,
And we will all the pleasures prove
That valleys, groves, hills, and fields,
Woods, or steepy mountain yields.

And we will sit upon rocks,
Seeing the shepherds feed their flocks,
By shallow rivers to whose falls
Melodious birds sing madrigals.

And I will make thee beds of roses
And a thousand fragrant poises,
A cap of flowers, and a kirtle
Embroidered all with leaves of myrtle;

A gown made of the finest wool
Which from our pretty lambs we pull;
Fair lined slippers for the cold,
With buckles of the purest gold;

A belt of straw and ivy buds,
With coral clasps and amber studs;
And if these pleasures may thee move,
Come live with me, and be my love.

The shepherds's swains shall dance and sing
For thy delight each May morning:
If these delights thy mind may move,
Then live with me and be my love.

Poem by Christopher Marlowe

Half-Marathon 2

2009-12-06T20:05:00.007-07:00

I ran my half-marathon as planned in Monterey California and it was fantastic! I was extremely nervous that I would not be able to do it because the longest I had ran by that point was 4.5 miles. But something happened during the race. I got lost.

I mean that I got lost in the people, the weather, the ambiance, and more. I felt like the more I ran, the more energy was filling my body. To the point where I felt like I could have ran forever. We ran right next to the ocean. I must admit that there where some points in time where I felt like the water was beckoning me and I cold just throw myself in it and it would catch me. It was that inviting looking. The weather was absolutely perfect. Seriously. And there were so many volunteers out to give us drinks (H2O, Gatorade, Beer)as we ran by. People came out of their stores and houses to cheer us on. It meant so much. They added fuel to my fire.
It was one of the most amazing things that I have ever done. And I am so glad that I had my sister there experiencing it with me. She was a big part of what made it so wonderful. I definitely would like to do it again.

Half-Marathon

2009-11-09T12:28:00.002-07:00

My sister and I signed up about two months ago to do a half marathon this weekend. Unfortunately, we have not been able to prepare as well as we would have liked to. And I am very nervous. Usually, I am a sprinter. Do it fast and get it over with. I have never ran a long race. No 5 or 10Ks. Please guys, keep your fingers crossed for me. I just want to finish and know that I can check that off on my list of things to do before I die. I'll have to let you know how it goes.

"Attention Span: Our National Education Crisis" by Oliver DeMille

2009-10-04T10:56:00.001-06:00

From "Attention Span: Our National Education Crisis" by Oliver DeMille

"...the right approach to daily life is eight hours a day of sleep, eight hours a day of work, and eight hours a day of leisure...spoke at a time when leisure didn't mean entertainment. Indeed, leisure means serving people, studying, learning, being involved in community service & government, and so on--whereas the slaves in Rome were considered incapable of leisure and so their masters gave them entertainment to keep them pacified."

"Opinions are just guesses. Great people in history know and choose. Opinions are really nothing more than the lazy man's counterfeit for knowing and choosing...there is a place for opinions, but after the hard work is completed, not as a replacement for it."

Unexpected events

2009-08-19T13:17:00.003-06:00

This has been quite the active month. There have been some events lately that have come out of nowhere. It took me by surprise. It`s not bad, just surprising. Like how well my med school things have been coming along. I have had doctors approach me to see if I wanted to take part in their research. And I have had the opportunity to visit family that I have not seen in years. And so much more. My life seems full of life lately. It makes me feel different inside; as if a part of me that was still a child is finally growing. I a happy, scared, puzzled, warm, astounded, and calm. It`s weird. but then, that`s life for you.

The Time Traveler's Wife, an unforgettable story

2009-07-28T00:26:00.005-06:00

One of my favorite books is "The Time Traveler's Wife" by Audrey Niffenegger. I worked at the library six years ago and when I would put the books away, this book would always attract my eyes. For some reason I kept ignoring it. Then one day I picked it up and read the synopsis, then I put it back. I think around that time, there were so many books that would attract me and then I would feel let down after reading it that for a while I was sticking with authors I knew. But one day I finally took it home. It was one of the best books I had ever read. I cried, I laughed, I hoped, I despaired, I FELT.

It is about a man named Henry DeTamble who was born with a genetic disorder which causes him to spontaneously shift in time. He never knows how long these "trips" will last nor where in time he will go. In one of these shifts he meets his future wife, Clare Abshire, when she is just five/six years old and Henry is in his forties (although Henry was born in 1963 and Clare in 1971). When they finally do meet as adults when Clare is 20 and Henry is in his late twenties, he has no idea who she is, but she is very much aware of who he is. And so begins one of the most poignant love stories that I have ever read. But this book is more than a romantic novel. It is a story of life. Of the frequent trials encountered by ordinary and extraordinary people and the way they face these trials. This is not a novel you can read and forget or put down. You become completely involved in the lives and emotions of the different characters. You connect. It is a rich novel. And I thoroughly enjoyed it.

I found out recently that a movie based on this novel is coming out in the beginning of August. I was very excited. But then I begin to think, "can they really do it justice?" Can they take the flavor of the words and transform it into a profound, unforgettable visual story? Either way, I am for sure going to watch it and pray that I will not be disappointed. But I beg you all to please, please, please give this book a chance. It is not a chickflick. It is a peopleflick (corny, I know, but true;)

Updates

2009-07-16T20:23:00.004-06:00

I don't know why I write so sporadically. I will just have to continue making it a goal to write more often. Especially since it seems like so many things have happened.

I am still enjoying the switch in job location. It really has saved my sanity!

I have a new niece! This is the best of all the news that I have. She is just beautiful! She was born five days ago and she has already taken a huge chunk of my heart. I love both my nieces so much. I wonder if my parents will excuse me from not having kids since they now have two wonderful granddaughters to spoil ;)

School is crazy but good. I've missed it. Not the stress but the fun and joy of learning things that I might not have learned otherwise. At least not as well as I am learning it right now. I love Psychics! Who would have thought.

I am planning a trip to Canada in August to visit family. I have not been there in years and it will be nice to get away. I get to see family members that I have not seen in years. This, sadly, will be the first time that I have spent my own money, given of my time to go see them. Usually, since I was a teenager or a freshman in high school at the time, my parents pay for it and I go in the summer when I have nothing to do. And so it's always been about me, not them. I don't know if that makes since to anyone else. But I will make sure to post pictures when I come back.

Well, that's all I'll write for now. I will post pictures for sure soon!

Donald from Ireland

2009-06-06T22:08:00.010-06:00

Someone I worked with said today while we were having a discussion on life ambitions and people giving up on their dreams when they think they're too old, "You are going to turn 25, 30, 40, ect... one way or another, so why not try to turn those while you are doing something you want to do? And even if you have you will only be able to do it for a short time, isn't better to have a short time of happiness and fulfillment then not at all in your whole life?"

This is Jean. All his life he had wanted to be a chef. When he was in his early sixties he decided he was going to do it. He started out in a small non profit restaurant, and look how happy he is. And I wish I had taken a picture of my face when I tasted his food. Delicious!

Max

2009-05-21T22:22:00.007-06:00

I got a cat! Huge move for me who is a commitment phobe. And he is absolutely fabulous. He does the most annoying things that I find so cute. He's a month old and a friend of a friend gave him to me.

My little niece is completely obsessed with him. She sleeps over all the time just so she could get to spend more time with him. Funny thing is...

He also very much enjoys her company. At night, I always put him on his bed, but during the middle of the night, I often wake up to him beside me. But when my niece sleeps over, he gets under the covers and she (while she is sleeping) puts her feet on top of him. He finds it blissful! I had to get up just to take this picture. Thus I think his favorite place is always right next to her or under her fitful sleeping movements. It's cute.

Biggest loser

2009-05-13T20:01:00.005-06:00

I was watching biggest loser for the first time in my life last night. It was a three hour season finale and I saw an hour of it. There was an elderly man on it by the name of Jerry. He was 64 years old. And he was incredible! He was on the show for about 1-2weeks and then was ill and had to withdraw from the show. Well, he continued working on his weight and health at home. By the time he was on the show last night, he had lost 177 lbs. 177lbs!
Seriously, he is the best "stop making excuses, you can get it done if you really want" example. And what I really liked about the show was that it was not just about looking better (which of course all of us want to do), it was about being healthier, increasing your self confidence, and becoming happier. Noone needs to be or stay obese.
When a friend and I had gained weight, we said,"well, anyone who doesn't accept us for who we are, doesn't really love us. This is who we are and they can either accept it or leave it!"
Her and I were laughing about that the other day. It's funny the kind of excuses you make for being or acting a certain way. And it's true, some people have a harder time to lose the weight than others, but lose it you can still do.

I once participated on an autopsy of an obese women. This woman had all sorts of health problems. When the pathologist opened her up I was shocked and sickened to see that not only did she have more than three inches of fat hanging from the inside of her skin, but it was also pressing on her organs. That was the moment I truly realized just how bad for you fat was. It was very sad. And seeing what a small frame this woman had when we opened her up. All the fat was literally squeezing her to death!

I hope no one thinks this post is directed at them. It is directed at myself. I get into these places in my life where I act as if I had no other choice and no other way of being. And to be honest, it's just me being lazy and unmotivated. I wanted to write this to motivate myself in the future when I get into those states. Hopefully, this post will also help someone else.
http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/contestants/current_cast/jerry/
http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/photos/gallery#item=72152

New place, new job, new attitude, new...

2009-05-06T20:47:00.004-06:00

Alright, so everything has changed. No scratched that, I have changed everything. I am not much into self praise, but I have to say that I am excited that I had the guts to go through it. Thanks to some amazing advice and examples of others. Well, I guess it's not all self praise :) It's so easy to just be comfortable and not deviate from the norm. But I did it! Now, we'll see what happens. Things have been better than I thought they would be and I hope it continues in the pattern. I feel like both my mind and my heart are open to new experiences. I am happy!

Susan Boyle

2009-04-19T02:56:00.004-06:00

I know everyone has been blogging about this amazing woman, but I had to add my two cents. Wow! When a friend showed me the youtube video of her yesterday, I had heard of her but did not really care or understand anything about her. Watching her yesterday I realized so many things.

1.) It's never too late to fulfill your dreams.
2.) Never judge a book by it's cover.
3.) Especially when that cover is being judged by a standard that is stupid and pointless. What is true beauty?
4.) What true presence is. That lady has amazing stage presence.
5.) All laughed at her, but she did not look phased by it. Does it really matter who laughs at you? Because in the end, you could be the one who has the last laugh. Or who brings all those who are laughing to tears of pleasure and astonishment.

There's so much more that I came to realize. I was astounded and amazed by her. To be honest, as I watched and heard her sing, I laughed and joked with my friend, but all I wanted to do was cry. I was profoundly touched. As she sang, the beauty of her voice ripped the worldly film which had coated my eyes to the point that, for a moment, I could not see the beauty which she possessed.

Please watch her here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY

I'm so excited, and I just can't hide it...

2009-04-17T02:02:00.004-06:00

Flowers are blooming, birds are chirping, the sky is beautiful and clear...Okay so it's still snowy, cold, and overcast, but this is how my heart feels right now. What's caused this sudden burst of warmth in my being? Well...This will be my last week working 7on/7off graveyard! I am so excited that I cannot even find the words to describe it. I feel like a whole new world will be opening up for me.

I feel like spring personified!

Failure to launch

2009-04-01T05:33:00.003-06:00

Viktor (my supposed Greek god) and I have gone out once and I have cancelled five dates in between and a bit before then. Let me explain what happened on our first date.

He worked real late that day and so he asked if we could do the date after he got off work, which was around ten p.m. We went to see one of the light shows at the Imax theater. As with all things theater/cinema/stand up comedy routines, not much talking happened. Afterwards we wondered around for fifteen minutes or so trying to get to know each other, but it was real late.

These are the things I found out about him:
-From California (of Mexican origin)
-Very close to his mother and brother (both live in California)
-Works everyday but Sunday
-Wishes to go to med school one day
-Extremely kind, courteous (very much the gentleman)

How I felt:
-NOTHING! All the chemistry I felt at the beginning was gone. I'm not even sure why I felt it. I was very saddened and disappointed. But, I decided perhaps I was just being weird and so, we will have a second date because I did enjoy my first date with him and he really is a sweet guy.

This is the kind of advice I have been getting from friends so far:

"Laureen, you have to stop thinking like a guy. The chemistry is not usually going to happen instantaneously. To a woman, that is connected to her emotions. If you only go on one date, you're emotions are not involved and so there will be no chemistry."

"He was nervous for his first date, give him a chance."

"Your problem is that you're looking for Mr. Perfect and there is no such creature."

...The frustration! What am I to do? How to rectify my attitude? Or is it just that I'm just picky? Or that what I want, truly want, has just not walked through the door yet?

My Greek god

2009-03-07T23:24:00.002-07:00

Okay, so we've spoken a couple of times (my Greek god and I). Unfortunately, I've had to bail out on him twice on the first date we were suppose to have (work/family things). But I can't begin to tell you how much I enjoy talking to this kid, so far. Of course, as most men do, he is putting his best foot forward right not. But I am enjoying that foot. Last time we spoke, he said to me, "You are even better than I imagined you would be." Cupid might as well had been across the room sending darts into my heart. Wow, what a great thing to say. I melted.
It's kind of interesting that I feel that, lately, most of the boys I've been with or have thought about being with give me a lot of backhanded compliments or just make me feel unsure of myself. Not in this case. It has been a nice change. Even if this goes nowhere, it's been nice to feel this way again. I'm excited to finally go out with him. It's too bad that we have such hard schedules to mesh :( Hopefully it will be worth it when we finally do :)

Decisions, decisions, decisions...

2009-03-07T23:17:00.004-07:00

Sorry it's been a while since I posted. It sometimes gets discouraging when not a lot of people comment on my blog. It's always good to get feedback. Although I know many of you say you read it but just don't comment. It's okay, but it still gets a bit discouraging :( But don't worry, I am not going to let that stop me because I LOVE to write. And I write here for myself and not just for others :)

On to better things. I have been struggling lately with some decisions that I have to make. I am not quite there yet, but almost. I am not sure I'm looking forward to what the final result of my decision is turning out to be :( As soon as I make it, I will let you know.

Greek gods

2009-02-20T02:14:00.000-07:00

I was at a Greek restaurant with my sister today. And as soon as I met the waiter, I was attracted. I thought he was kind, funny, and cute (okay, more like a god according to my response to his pheromones). But I did not give it much thought. And when he left, I told my sister that I thought he was cute. Well, later on he brings us our food and I was not feeling to well, so I just smiled a little. Well, as my sister and I were eating, she picked up the receipt and lo and behold, he had written his phone number on it and said "call me." We were dying with laughter, but in a good way. I was way impressed with his subtle boldness. What do you think I'm going to do? I know many of my friends who check out my blog are horrible at commenting. Well, this is your chance. I can now erase something from my before I die to do list ;)

On the phone with a guy

2009-02-16T18:32:00.004-07:00

A guy I am talking to on the phone right now just said, "You know what I love about you, Laureen? Your flirtiness. It's sassy,fun, and makes me feel special at the same time. I could spend a long time in your company." Wow. Yes, I am definitely enjoying the phone call ;)

I took a trip to Japan

2009-02-08T07:00:00.005-07:00

Two nights ago, I had a dream. In my dream, I went to Japan and stayed with my friend, Sachiko's mother. I remembered so much of the dream the first two minutes when I woke up. I forgot about it after that. Then yesterday morning, while at work, out of the blue the dream came rushing back to me and boy where the feelings I was experiencing amazing! You see, while I was in Japan, I met someone and fell totally and hopelessly in love with them. Not everything was perfect, eventhough I can't remember that aspect of my dream. There were problems, I don't know with what or with whom. I don't remember what my love looked like or what he was like, but I do remember being happy. Deliriously happy.

I looked up my dream online and this is what it says it means:
Love

To dream of love of being in love, suggests intense feelings carried over from a waking relationship. It implies happiness and contentment with what you have and where you are in life. On the other hand, you may not be getting enough love in your daily life. We naturally long for the sense to belong and to be accepted.

Japan
If you have never lived in Japan, to dream of it symbolizes an extremist attitude towards the subject matter of the dream. This comes from the Japanese ritual suicide, hara-kiri. A tradition of being expected to fall on your sword to atone for shame and dishonor.

Well...I'm hoping it's the former and not the latter. If any of you have any other meanings for this dream, let me know :)

Med School

2009-02-07T03:42:00.000-07:00

I know it's been forever since I wrote a post. Once again, I need to repent. And so one of my New Year's resolution is to write more post. I often debate with myself on what exactly to post. I feel like so many things have been happening but...I don't know. Okay, here goes some things that's been happening in my inner sanctum.

I need to start apply for medical schools. But I found out that some of the classes I took have "expire." How exactly does that happen?! Thus, I have to retake some pre-med classes I took forever ago. I am NOT a happy camper. Perhaps this will be a good refresher course for the MCAT. At least my sister is doing it with me.

Friendshipping on Facebook

2009-01-15T07:53:00.000-07:00

Facebook is a great way of communicating your feelings. For instance, let's say, this is hypothetically speaking of course, that I asked someone to be my friend on facebook and they never reply. Well, then they have told me without ever having to look at me in the eye, "I don't really want to be your friend or get to know you better." It's great! The only problem is that I still feel saddened and embarrassed :( I feel like this branch; alone, lifeless, and colorless. Ouch.

Katja

2009-01-05T23:12:00.006-07:00

What a week it's been. My friend Katja came to visit from Ireland and we planned as many activities as we could. Katja and I met when I was visiting Ireland three years ago. I was in Dublin and decided to go to church that Sunday. Church was great, except for the fact that the Bishop had such a heavy Irish accent, I could only understand every other word. I loved it! After church this cute girl came up to me and saidn "Hi, I'm Katja, can I show you around?" We hung out for the next three days after that. She was memorable. We've kept in touch for the last couple of years and I was very excited she was able to come to visit. Unfortunately, the first day she was here, I had to work and so we were only able to have lunch together, then we came back to my house for her to rest and me to go to cook and go to (I had to make a fruit salad for work that night) but we ended up just talking and I never got to sleep. Which was okay since I had been so excited for her to come. We also hung out with my roommate's brother, Tom, who was visiting for a couple of days.
Instead of giving long explainations about the stuff we did, I will just give a list: Snowboarding (it was our first time and we were scared beyond belief. But it turned out to be a blast and a lot easier than we imagined. We decided that this year we will be focusing on doing one thing a month that we have never done before. Snowboarding was our January adventure), wedding, lunch with some old friends of Katja's (the friend's mother made lunch. I can't begin to tell you how delicious it was!), traveling to see a comedy that ended up being cancelled (sucked since we drove quite a bit away to see it), New Years with many cool friends (great fireworks), Seeing "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button," a must see in my personal opinion, breakfast (Katja doesn't always have access to waffles and eggs in Ireland like they do here), shopping (I think Katja's my lucky star because I've never found as many cool things with such great deals), long and wonderful conversations about everything and everyone, dancing, temple sessions, dates, a mixture of different foods for lunch/dinner that Katja has never tried, game night, movie night, Body Worlds Museum (It was my second time and Katja's first time. Another must see), and much more that I think I am too tired at this moment to mention.

Only eight hours

2008-12-26T01:24:00.002-07:00

I just found out that in my state, the plowers are only allowed to work eight hours because they are not willing to pay them overtime. Which means when there is a snowstorm and their eight hours are up, then we're screwed. I'm glad my life and the life of so many others are not worth overtime pay.

What my ad for a man would look like

2008-12-24T03:11:00.004-07:00

Wanted: Fun loving (playful)-sense of humor (I need someone who can and will make me laugh)
Affectionate/Loving***
Lover of books, music, and movies (foreign films a must)
Faithful
Considerate
Easy going/Does not loose their temper easily*****THIS IS EXTREMELY IMPORTANT TO ME.
Likes/Loves to dance (this is a hard one since most guys I know don't fulfill this. Ironic considering the pheromones flying around when dancing is involved. How can man not want to participate in this ritual?)
Intelligent (but not cocky about it)/curious
Not afraid to try things
Ambitious
Creative
Doesn't care what others think (besides, of course, me)/Doesn't need to prove himself.
Allows me to express myself w/o making me feel judged, embarrassed, or silly
Selfless
***Someone who I can be myself around****
Patient/Not easily angered***
Passionate

Okay, so far that's my list. And again, since it is 3:25 in the morning, I know I am forgetting a few things. I will have to add those later. Even though I have some stars next to some but not next to others, that does not mean the others are not very important to me. The stared items just happen to be things that I have had recent experience with and have realized just how dear they are. I don't know, hard to explain. Anyone who has any inputs please let me know. I'm curious about what might be on you guy's list.

Two

2008-12-17T09:32:00.006-07:00

Second in the people I admire series is my cousin Vanessa. How can I describe her? One of the things I admire most about her is her confidence. She knows who she is and what she's about and never doubts it. She is not one of those people who talk a lot or needs to be the center of attention. She doesn't need that. Her confidence is a quiet kind that you can feel and see and that does not need to be forced on you. Those who have met her know what I am talking about. And those who have not, will hopefully one day meet her and understand the truth of my words. When you meet her, her body language says take me as I am world; love me or not, but this is who I am and who I am going to be!

Last week

2008-12-11T02:45:00.003-07:00

I know what you're thinking. Two post in one day, the fat lady has sung and pigs are flying! Well, okay, maybe not that drastic. I decided to write about what I did last week. It always feels like my week off goes by real fast and then when I start working, there's a brief period of amnesia where I can't remember anything I did doing my time off. I need to get better about recording them here so that I can always look it up when I'm ask, "so what did you do last week."

Wednesday: Helped my sister out with her business since the girls she hired where flaking out on her. It was tiring, but fun. I met quite a bit of guys while there. But, unfortunately, only the type that were fun to flirt with and not interesting enough (for me at least) to go out with.

Thursday: Although, I am as anti-gun as you can get, some of my guy friends decided to take me out shooting. Well, first it started with an article with various examples on why it's important to know how to protect yourself. I will attempt to post the article as soon as I can. One of them mentioned the fact that it's always wise to know how to use the weapons around you. And that the whole point of really owning again is to discourage others from attacking you and yours. Most of the time, he said, you will not even need to fire at anyone. Back to the shooting. Three of my guys friends took me to this place where we it could be just us practicing. I was freaked out when I first started. But I have to say I was impressed with myself. With both a .45 and a .22, I was able to hit all my targets. I only missed one. I did not expect to be able to hit anything at all. And these guys were amazing and patient.
Afterwards, we went out for Italian. The real stuff. I had a blast.

Friday: The real highlight of Friday (and the only thing I can really remember)is dancing. Three girlfriends and I decided to hit the clubs. Okay, just one club, but it was a great decision. Because we were girls, we were able to get in a lot sooner than we would have otherwise. Gosh, I love being a woman! We danced the night away. Yes, I did feel a couple of hands grab my butt, but I was quick to slap them away. A few man learned that invading my private property came with a lot of pain and consequences. The throbbing in my feet later on was definitely worth the discomfort.

Saturday: My roommate's nieces came to spend the night. They were a riot! They were six, five, and two going on thirty. I laughed the night away. It always feels good to have children around. They were full of love.

Sunday: Church was good. By the time it ended, I felt peaceful and warm. My roommates and I worked on a skit we were preparing for the talent show. These girls make life...full. I needed them in my life right now.

Monday: The Talent Show. I never realized before just how talented the people around me were. I was impressed. Then our turn came. And of course, that is when I became nervous. No one ever believes me when I say this, but I am so shy, especially in front of a big group of people. I started to shake. But I was so busy looking at the other girls as we squeezed our whole bodies into XL sweaters, that I soon forgot all about my nervousness. I didn't worry about doing everything perfectly, I just...had fun.

I had a lot more I wanted to say, but it's getting real busy at work right now. Hopefully, I will continue to be good about sharing all the adventures I will continue to have.

Pros and Cons

2008-12-11T02:35:00.005-07:00

The pros and cons of working graveyard.

Pros: -I can't stand having to get up early Monday mornings after a wonderful weekend.
-ummm...I know there was more. I will have to think of it on my day off.

Cons: -Miss all the wonderful social activities at night when most people are clocked out of work.
-Go to sleep in the dark and wake up in the dark (at least in the winter).
-The human body was just not meant to work that way (what with cortisol levels and all). Even when you sleep well doing the day, you're still tired during the night.

I guess I can't make this list as impartially as I would like to since it's 0242 in the morning and I am at work ans still have three and a half hours to go.

Renewed vow to be a good blogger

2008-12-07T19:18:00.003-07:00

Last month, I was horrible at being a good blogger. I will make it a goal to write more this month. I will even attempt to post twice in a day, if that is at all possible. I feel like so many things happen that I never write about. But I have repented. From this day forward, I will never not blog again (at least this month :)

The miracle of life

2008-11-22T16:29:00.004-07:00

My heart is in a major high right now. For the last couple of weeks, I have had a family member that's been very sick. They had to put her in a chemically induced coma. But good news everyone: she's doing so much better that since of today, they are taking her out of it. Yahooooo!

One

2008-11-02T01:19:00.004-06:00

The first person I would like to mention as someone I admire in my "Admiration series" is my niece. Of course, being her aunt, I am absolutely in love with her. I couldn't love her more if she had been a child of my own body. I watched her come into the world and I have watched her as she has reached the ripe old age of three.It has been fascinating to me to watch her develop the attributes that will become a part of who she is as more years go by. She is a bundle of energy. And oh so smart. The list of things that she does and says that make me admire her is extremely long. What she loves, she loves well and no one can do or say anything bad about that thing or that person which she holds in affection. The other day my sister said how horrible of a mother she was while my niece was still in the room. Well, my niece was not having it. She turned on my sister and said "You're a good mommy. Don't say that. I love my mommy." How cute is that?! She is curious about everything around her and is willing to take as much time as she needs to learn about whatever catches her attention. And one of my favorite; she is fearless. This quality is also a scary one for me. I have nightmares about the kind of Shenanigans she can get into. But her courage is a trait that I very much want to assimilate into my own personality. What would the world be like if we all had the courage to step outside our comfort zones and put ourselves out there? I am happy to be fortunate enough to have the chance to look at the world through her eyes.

Power

2008-10-30T14:52:00.002-06:00

"The most potent weapon in the hands of the oppressor is the mind of the oppressed."
-- Stephen Biko

I think we can pretty much apply that to anything in our lives.

The Framers of the Bill of Rights did not purport to "create" rights. Rather, they designed the Bill of Rights to prohibit our Government from infringing rights and liberties presumed to be preexisting.
-- Justice William J. Brennan

America did not invent human rights. In a very real sense, it is the other way around. Human rights invented America.
-- Jimmy Carter

Vote for Obama...cause he's black

2008-10-24T08:28:00.003-06:00

I went shopping with my sister yesterday. They had an amazing sale of J Crew items. While not being a shopper (I detest shopping. Get me in then out as quickly as possible), I admitted to my sister that this was an opportunity not to be missed. While the cashier was ringing our items, she kept making ignorant comments which I was trying my best to ignore. And then right before we were done, she said "I'm sure I don't need to ask who you're voting for." Luckily for her, my sister was turned away on the phone and did not hear that comment. Lets just say that my sister does not suffer fools easily. At first, I just stared at her not really comprehending what the heck she was talking about. And then it hit me. Why does whom I vote for have to be a racial thing? Did that mean that she was voting for McCain because he's white?! Well, I told her, nicely and patiently, that I was looking at the campaigns and the policies of each candidate to make an informed and confident decision. She did not reply. I don't know why and to be honest, I did not care. I cannot stand to be reduced to a skin that just happens to be black. Why is my mind or my heart dismissed? I do get a lot of ignorant comments, and most of the time I understand that it's a lack of knowledge on their part. And that they need to be educated. It does not mean I am not annoyed or hurt sometimes by these comments. I do NOT have to do, like, or say certain things because I happen to be black. I love who I am and my skin goes with it. But my skin is just a piece of me. It is NOT a definition of who I am.

A daunting task

2008-10-23T06:15:00.005-06:00

Here I was sitting in a chair next to my brother-in-law while he was hard at work studying at four in the morning, when suddenly, an amazing idea lighted upon my mind. What is beauty? It seems as if the world only finds beauty in physical things. I must admit, I have spend quite a bit of time admiring the beauty of others in a...physical way (there are beautiful men out there:) But while on a trip to Yellowstone National Park, I was taken aback with the fact that I am a very lucky girl. I begun to ponder about the people I admire. Not in a way that makes me feel the need to compare myself, but in a way that either challenges me to improve myself or just causes me to be pensive in some way or another. I have decided to feature them in this blog and explain, if I find the words, why I hold them, or at least one of the traits they have, in such high esteem . These people have lifted, encouraged, confounded, humored, challenged, and beautify me and others around them. This will be quite time consuming since I encounter and have amazing people in my life. And so I decided to divide the task. I will feature someone every time I can. I'm excited. They will be people who leave me in awe and take my breath away. We'll see what else I will add. I'm still uncertain about how exactly to proceed with this. But it is something I very much yearned to do.

To touch or not to touch...

2008-10-17T23:53:00.010-06:00

Jacky was one of the men I met while volunteering for Les Petits Frères de Pauvres. We made an instant connection. I’m not sure if that connection was bad or good. You will understand as you read on. Jacky and me immediately made plans to spend time together (that was what I was there to do, spend time with them no matter what we did). The first couple of times were fantastic. I loved it and I loved him. He wanted to make sure I saw all the wonderful places in Paris and experience all the great restaurants. He was from the North of France and had a different accent from the Parisians. It was adorable. But Jacky had this one little problem; He love women. Not that that’s a bad thing, but…well…let me finish the story and you will understand. After it just being usually me and him when we went to our little outings, another volunteer arrived from Utah. From that point on, it was always Jacob and me. We rarely spent anytime separated from each other. Jacky was NOT happy with the change. Jacky could be perverted and vulgar, but he tried to restrain himself when he was with me. But when Jacob came it was as if there had been a treaty between Jacky and me that was broken. I became pretty uncomfortable with the things he would say and saddened because that was not MY Jacky.
One day, we went to Paris Plage. It was Herve, Abdallah, Eduard, Amelie, Jacob, Jacky, and me. While walking there, Jacky decided to walk next to me. He had been distanced and had not given Jacob and I a chance to visit with him. I was very sad. I thought for a minute that my Jacky was back, but I was so, so wrong. While we were walking, I looked to my left at the Seine and suddenly felt a weird sensation on my right breast. It seemed that Jacky had decided to give my breast a squeeze ( a long up and down squeeze). I was surprised and shocked. I looked over at him to see that he was bright red and smiling. I said, “Jacky, did you just touch something that did not belong to you?” And he was too busy smiling and being happy to give me a response. All that kept going through my mind was “I can’t believe I just got felt up by a 55 year old pervert!” As you can all see, I had quite a bit of adventure in Paris…sigh…I miss those days 

I use to have better pictures of everyone. And some...interesting pictures of Jacky, unfortunately, my laptop broke down on me after I downloaded the pictures and have lost them all. The only reasons I have these is because I e-mailed them to some friends and they were able to send me copies. As you see, most of the time, Jacky was fond of suits, trousers, and anything gentlemanly. It was just the way he rolled :)

Habeus Corpus

2008-10-15T15:25:00.002-06:00

I consider our constitution to be one of the greatest written masterpieces. I don't think when the Founding Fathers were writing the constitution that they thought one day someone like George Bush would be president. Many unconstitutional occurrence have occurred in the last eight years and it is now people are waking up and asking questions? What saddens me is that they (or we, because I've done my share of overlooking)have become more interested in the government because of the state of the economy right now when they've realized that things are not going their way. But it seems they are still ignoring all the other things that's been going on. Things like the fact that other branches of the government have taken it into their hands to momentarily displace Habeus Corpus when it is only Congress that is allowed to do this and only under certain conditions. I feel tired and disappointed. How are we going to fix anything if we keep our blinders on about the state of our government? I hope we will truly be pensive about whom we vote for this election. That we will listen and search before we decide. That we will remember that we are not suppose to represent the government; the government is suppose to represent us.

My date with Adam

2008-10-09T23:49:00.011-06:00

Adam was one of the most fun and creative dates that I have had in forever. For our date we went on a hike and photographed anything and everything that caught our interest. He brought his tripod for this activity. Poor guy carried it around for quite some time, but it was wholly worth it. These words that I'm using to describe the date do not begin to describe the quality of the date itself. He was a blast to be with. And my favorite part was that he kept me laughing the whole evening. Here are some pictures that are a result of this adventure of ours.

Seizing the Day

2008-10-08T15:38:00.005-06:00

Okay, I'm finally going to do it. I'm going to take the MCAT! Med school is something I've wanted to do for years (since I was a child, actually). But one thing or another kept veering in my path and I swayed away from realizing that dream. I want to be a wife and a mother. That is my number one priority . But this desire is not waning and I feel it is something I am guided to do. I know Heavenly Father will help do what I need to do to for Medical school and for my family. Thank goodness He knows me better than I know myself. I can completely trust Him and His guidance. In my list of things to do before I die that I made years ago, applying to med school was number one. No longer will I drift with the waves of the sea. I will act; I will seize the day. I am filled with excitement! I can't begin to tell you how calm, content, and charged I feel. I feel like the kid in this picture (↑). I'm being taken for a ride and boy am I enjoying it! :) I'll just have to make sure to maintain a social life. Friends and family, I'm counting on you guys to help me with this no matter what I say.

Now, one of the most stressful part; studying for the MCAT.

Sleepwalking

2008-10-07T19:49:00.003-06:00

This morning was my last morning at work (I work the graveyard shift for seven days and then I have seven days off). On the morning after my last graveyard I usually stay up for about 26 or 28 hours. Well let me tell you, it is exhausting! Well, after my bellydancing class, I started talking to a friend on the phone. The next thing I know, I was sitting on my bed. I have a vague recollection of starting my walk home, but everything else is unclear. How can half an hour be wiped out of my mind? I have no idea what my poor friend thought as we "conversed". But this made me realize how amazing the human body is. My body knew where to go, eventhough my mind (my conscious mind) was not there to guide it. It also obviously knew what to say to reassure my friend that I was still listening, when in fact, I was a million Zs away. The other thing is that, my body needed sleep, so it went into some weird hibernation while I was still, supposedly, active.

In 1987, a 23 year old male killed his parents-in-law while he was sleepwalking and was found not guilty. I wonder if my friend will forgive me as easily when she finds out that I slept (?) through half an hour of her telling me how horrible she feels when her feelings and words are not acknowledged or dismissed? I think I'm way beyond tired now. I'm going to bed, hopefully I'll remember writing this in the morning:)

My grand performance

2008-10-02T08:16:00.007-06:00

A couple of nights ago(or mornings, days and such gets complicated when you work the graveyard shift)I decided to stay awake by listening to love songs. I, sometimes unfortunately, am a hopeless romantic. I blame this on the fact that as a child I was always surrounded by my aunts (there are eight of them). It started out simple enough. I wanted to listen to “I’m not that that girl” from Wicked. From that point it moved to Aida, Rent, then Olivia Newton-John. Sadly, everything went downhill from there. And soon, I was standing on my bed singing my heart out (as quietly as possible since my roommates were asleep)with my imagination creating a theater filled with people who were there to see me perform (in my PJ's no less). You know how they say we all have guardian angels around watching over us? Well, my guardian angel must have been rolling around on the floor laughing and calling others to join him in watching me make a fool of myself. But I had a great time! I really should do it more often.

This is a picture of me making a fool of myself as, once again, my imagination took flight. From this picture, you can imagine exactly what I looked like that sad, long ago night (okay, two nights ago).

My love affair with Paul Newman

2008-10-01T08:27:00.008-06:00

When I was seven, I saw “Cat On a Hot Tin Roof.” I fell instantly, madly, and helplessly in love. Gosh, I didn’t know what hit me. Imagine your favorite dessert and that initial taste where your taste buds are bursting with pleasure and sensory overload, then perhaps you will be able to imagine how I felt as I watched Paul Newman. It was originally a play but they had to change a few subject matters in the process of making it a movie.
How do I love Paul Newman? Let me count the ways... Okay, obviously, there was his looks. I melted when I looked at him. But besides that, he was an amazing actor who truly enjoyed his craft. He was a good guy with a great heart. He created "Newman's Own", which is a company that donates all of it's proceeds, which has been more than 200 million dollars, to charity. He was politically involved, something that many people in the U.S don't seem to be. And he was a devoted family man. I read in a couple of places that when asked about infidelity he usually replied, "Why go out for hamburger when you have steak at home?" What is there not to love about this man?
I’m posting a clip below of one of the scenes from the movie. I’m not saying it’s the best scene, but it is a great scene. I hope you will all go out and rent the movie. If you do, tell me what you think.

This is the movie that also started my admiration for the acting capacity of Elizabeth Taylor.

Men Wanting Emotion Robots Need Not Apply

2008-09-30T01:31:00.011-06:00

I have recently started reading "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert. In one part of the book she talks about her relationship with a man named David, whom she was madly in love with him. Unfortunately, her relationship with him waned as more trials entered her life. Suddenly, she was no longer the confident, passionate woman he had met. She was now clingy and needy.
What is wrong with some men that they would even think that way? I have often heard men refer to women as "clingy" and "needy". In many of these cases, I have known the women involved and know for a fact that these men are just being insensitive morons. I am not saying that such a thing does not exist, but seriously, are those terms applied sometimes to women who are just at a hard stage in their lives. Or only having a bad week? Why is she expected to be cheerful, intelligent, indulgent of her man, and physically perfect? Why can't she have a moment of being sad, hurt, tired, and perhaps lonely? Why can't she turn to her guy needing physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual comfort without being told she is asking too much and her guy is too tired to indulge her. And of course all those times she has indulged him in his vulnerability is forgotten. Suddenly, she has ceased to be interesting, intelligent, and all the things he thought she was.
A friend of mine once broke down and cried in front of her boyfriend. Instead of comforting her, he informed her that her showing that weakness of her characteristic was a real turn off. Well, I guess some men, then, prefer robots who will be all that you want with no emotions involved...except perhaps their hero worship of him. And they are welcomed to her. I personally do not need that kind of men in my life.

9 Words Women Use

2008-09-27T05:56:00.004-06:00

I was emptying my e-mail of old mail (lets just say I’m an email pack rat) when I found this e-mail sent by my friend, Katja. I hope you get as much of a laugh out of it as I did.

9 words women use

Fine:

This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

Five Minutes:

If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more
minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

Nothing:

This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes.

Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

Go Ahead:

This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

Loud Sigh:

This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot
and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

That's Okay:

This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before
deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

Thanks:

A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome.

Whatever:

Is a women's way of saying Flip off!

Don't worry about it, I got it:

Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is
now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?" For the woman's response refer to #3.

Allez Les Bleus...What?

2008-09-27T05:19:00.008-06:00

I once volunteered with an organization called Les Petits Frères des Pauvres. An amazing organization that is very big in certain parts of Europe that was founded because of one man’s passion for and desires to help those less fortunate than himself. There were two parts to this organization. One part was helping the elderly in whatever way they needed help. The other part was teaching the homeless whom they had found a home for how to enjoy life. That meant whatever it took to make them appreciate all the good things that life has to offer. One of the people from this group was Jean. He was a character. And I adored him! But Jean had one obsession (okay, two if you include his love of sweets, which caused him to have his last two teeth removed, he cried--gosh he was adorable), soccer. The fortunate year that I found myself in France was during the World Cup (you have no idea how crazy people can get around that time...well...there is the superbowl, so maybe you do have an idea). Whenever there was a game, the only way I would get to spend time with Jean was if I watched them with him. He was the sweetest, calmest guy...unless he was watching soccer. Then he would scream "Allez les bleus." (go blues..cheering the french team on) or "imbecile!" It depended on what was going on with the game at the moment. And that is where my obsession with soccer started. He was contagious. Sad to say, at least sad for Jean, I no longer obsess over the game. But there are so many things to obsess over; I have to give them each their turn ;)

Second Best

2008-09-25T12:03:00.004-06:00

I don't know why but lately it seems like I've been everyone's bottom of the pile. For example:

"I'm sorry Laureen, I can't spend time with you because after we spoke I made plans with another friend of mine. We're going..."

"I'm sorry Jules, I can't go to the gym with you, this guy..."--I know, the opposite sex usually seems to take priority over friends. Sigh...

"I'm sorry Laureen, but I would much rather be with this girl..."

"I'm sorry sweetheart, but your brother really needs me more right now."--this from my mom. My MOTHER of all people. Well, they do say the middle child is never loved. Jk :)

There's nothing like having a series of these happening that make you feel unwanted, unattractive, and unappealing (0n many levels). It makes you feel very insecure. Insecure is not something anyone should feel. I feel like a kid who is being traded off between my divorced parents who have their own lives and do not wish me around. I notice that I've been closing off. Dismissing others before they can dismiss me. And that is not who I am. I refuse to be the kind of person who is so closed off, no one can get close to her. Anyways, I decided that I needed to do something about this. Trust me when I say it's not a good feeling being last on everyone's list and not a good feeling to empty my list so that no one's there to hurt me. I want to come up with a plan to get rid of these kind of experiences and stop dwelling on self-pity. I don't know what it is yet, but as soon as I come up with it I'll let you know. Sorry this has been a bit of a sad post. But next one should be happier, especially if I am able to think of a plan :) On a lighter note, I looked up "second best" on Wikipedia and this is what It said, "The Theory of the Second Best concerns what happens when one or more optimality conditions are not satisfied in an economic model."

Mikarose

2008-09-24T00:45:00.004-06:00

Mikarose is a company that I absolutely love because they have dresses that are pleasing to the female form, no matter what your form is. I don't know why but many companies feel that modesty equates to being frumpy. It drives me insane! I want to be modest and sexy. And you don't have to be modest to enjoy these beautiful dresses. Anyways, more leaves much to the imagination, which, I feel, creates more mystery and allure...

Life of a Traveler

2008-09-22T03:13:00.006-06:00

I currently work full time at a children's hospital as a Clinical Laboratory Scientist (CLS) or Medical Technologist (MT). I am fortunate that in my field there is something called a traveling CLS. The way it works is that these national companies will hire me out to hospitals all over the U.S. (sometimes all over the world). They then will pay my rent, utilities, and transportation expenses (wonderful, I know). This will give me a great opportunity to travel and to budget at the same time (two things that do not usually go together). They also pay much more than a permanent position. I do not have a permanent contract with any of these companies. I do, however, have to be at the hospitals for a minimum of 13 weeks. Some hospitals are in need of someone a little longer than that, but you are aware of this before undertaking the position.
Why, you might ask, have I not participated in this phenomenal opportunity? Well, when I first started, I , unfortunately, was unaware of this advantageous traveling CLS opportunity. But now being aware, I wish to partake in this adventure.
I became aware, through a friend in the field, of some positions available in Hawaii and California. Hmm...I've always wondered what Haupia tasted like.

My mother's advice on finding The One

2008-09-22T00:57:00.003-06:00

"As you're walking with her/him dressed in your Sunday best, make sure to go by a river and suddenly, out of the blue, push them in. If they are completely and utterly enraged, then you might consider finding yourself someone else. If they are annoyed, that's understandable. But if they laugh, that's even better. " --What can I say, I love my mom :)

Blogging

2008-09-21T03:06:00.000-06:00

My first blog! I'm excited, not sure if I'll have anything to say anyone wants to hear, but hey, going to post anyways. Never thought I'd see the day when I was blogging.